Dance

I think that one of my escape to feeling sad is just dancing..and I haven't danced for a really long time so I'm guessing that why I've been feeling down lately. Being the rebel of my family, I always had problems with everyone. No one could stand having me around because I was too...different from normal kids. I was the little kid who knew, acted, and looked like a teenager, and for some reason my family hated me for that. Life was hard for me and not everyone was there to stay, but dance was. 

At the age of four, my mom enrolled me to ballet dancing to the dance studio next to my kindergarten and so began the start of my life in dance. 

By the age of nine, I started to get interested with the way Pussycat Dolls dance. So then began the time when I learned bootyshake, chest pop, bellydance, etc. As weird as this sounds, it was my older brother and sister who taught me those. It was the only way I could communicate with them, dance helped me in that way with my family relationship. 

When I was ten, Michael Jackson died and this just wrong, but after that legend died only then did I started loving him. I began learning his way of dancing thus getting me interested into hip-hop. Ever since then I began learning different kinds of moves. My neighbour b-boys and so he taught me a few moves, invited me to dance battles with his friends, which always resulted me to getting in trouble with my family. 

Then I turned eleven, that year...I was depressed with alot of changes. I was switched to a new school and my closest friend left for Australia causing me to be alot more rebellious towards my parents. I sneaked out the house around 3 in the morning and run to my neighbour's place where he would just beg me to go home in fear of my father. I lied to my parents about going to my best friend's house, but then sneaked out later to go out with a guy who was at the age of 23 at that time to go to Times Square. Don't worry, nothing happened. He was just taking care of me, he's my "big bro" since my blood brothers aren't exactly the best. He, too, taught me how to danced; told me about dancing in clubs, b-boys, and all other kinds of dancing so then I began developing in hip-hop dancing. The types of dancing I did at the age of eleven and the people I hung out with caused me to be sort of tomboyish at that time, I don't recall being very feminine at that year at all. 

At the age of twelve, my relationship with dancing decreased. I wasn't at school, I stayed at home, but never gave the time to dance. Busying myself with trying to make my first relationship work, with drawing, with learning guitar, with writing stories, and with crying myself to sleep. It was that messed up until I forgot all about dancing. 

But I've let myself keep all my emotions all too long. 

It's about time I've let myself go loose again.